Naomi de S Wijeyeratne

When my sister Naomi was born it was another child in the De Silva Wijeyeratne family to bridge the gender ratio. Our mum who had 10 children before Naomi realized a difference in her during the routine baths and later she was diagnosed as a special needs child. This was a shock to my parents as they did not know about it.

Naomi taught our late parents that they had an important role in this world. They were starving for information about down syndrome children and joined an association for families with children who had different needs just to exchange ideas. Perhaps this awareness changed the way our late parents raised the her, where she was always the center of attention and was “special” in every sense of the word.

Naomi had to work on things that we took for granted: to crawl, walk and talk – the wait and the extra effort made on each milestone was a cause for celebration. There was never a dull moment growing up with her. Since she could not express or communicate in the traditional sense; her language was a top-secret in our household. Dressing her like a Barbie doll with ribbons and bows, going for walks with her and piggybacking her home were some of our early memories with her.

Despite the fears and worries of the family having such a special child “The Sumaga” and “Dayamina” centers for the differently abled played a major role in her gaining independence and autonomy.

She loved going to school and she was loved by all who came to know her as she was so gentle with a lot of humor. It was clear she was happy at these centers and the Sisters of Charity remained a source of stability and familiarity; they became a large part of her world. We as a family would like to thank each and every person at these two centers, who worked tirelessly with her and took care of Naomi. You made her life so rich and full of your love, care, and patience. We know you touched her life in a positive and impactful way and we are sure she touched yours similarly.

Naomi’s love for music and dancing started at an early age and remained a constant source of enjoyment. She was the first to take the dance floor at any party like a duck takes to water. She would be grinning from ear to ear and doing her baila and twirls as she listened to “The Gypsies,” her favorite band. One song she loved was Afric Simone’s – Ramaya. She looked forward to parties, especially the fun of Christmas time that came along with Santa Clause, fireworks, and caroling.

Still remember a bad experience right at front of our gate. When my family and the neighbors were doing the post-mortem of some event Naomi was not concerned about it, and she followed me to the room and sat beside me checking on me and holding my hand. Such was her empathy and sincere affection. Later when Mum was getting feeble she eagerly waited to spend some time at my place during the weekends. This gave me the opportunity to get close to her and spend more time pampering her.

I still remember one day I was late to get to Beddegana. By the time I reached Beddegana she was creating a rumpus and standing near the gate threatening to walk to my place. The moment I parked the car she got in and I could not even say hi to Mum. During these sleep overs both of us did a lot of singing, dancing, colouring, laughing, and screaming at silly stuff. She helped me to cut and chop vegetables and made sandwiches for the household. Ranjit always made sure that her goodies were stocked prior to her arrivals.

One thing my mum never forgot to mention during her twilight years during our visits was “look after Naomi” and with Mum passing away she lost her rock and could never come to terms with it. Insecurity crept in and she got into a shell and was lost in thought. There were many times we wished we could read her mind to keep her happy. Slowly she clung on to her next best and would follow her sister Depika wherever she went like – Mary and her little lamb.

COVID 19 was a severe blow to her as her social life collapsed. Despite how much we tried to explain the pandemic to her it was futile as she could not understand what terms like lockdowns, curfew, and pandemic meant. She started to fade and the much looked-forward visits to my place dried up and my visits to her increased.

Naomi girl you enriched our lives and filled our house with much love and laughter. You kept strong family bonds, a sense of community, and the belief that we were all in this together. You advocated for us to change the world to look beyond disability so you and others can flourish. Thank you for the empathy, love, and patience you taught us.

All these years we never left you alone but today you have decided to take the journey alone breaking our hearts into pieces. We will take a step back Naomi girl and allow you to go to the constant person you were asking for and the only person we could not bring back our “Amma”. Dad, Mum & Anne must be standing near the gates with open arms waiting to welcome you. Raise your wings, fly high and enjoy your new freedom, Naomi Boonja.

Dragging our feet we will join you soon choking to sing the hymns we once sang to put you to sleep, knowing very well we will never sing them again for you. Our house will not be the same and there are no words to express how much we will all miss you. Adios sweet princess until we all meet again on that beautiful shore. You will forever live in our hearts and thoughts.

Vinodini Jayawardena