Do all parents want their children to go to university?

by Goolbai Gunasekara

Does this seem a silly question? After nearly 50 years as a teacher, and more than half of that time as Principal of an International School, I can say with absolute certainty that parents are not always sensible… The daily rigorous advertising that goes on in the Sri Lankan papers urging parents to opt for various (and often dubious) higher educational facilities, cause many to be dazzled by the spurious claims made by locally based institutions in Sri Lanka as against the possibilities of going abroad. Of course, affordability is the main problem but assuming it is not a problem can a Principal count on sensible parents?

So let me first speak of parents who CAN afford to send their children abroad but hesitate to do so for reasons (that to me, their ambitious Principal) seem totally without substance. Let me mention a few.

Four sisters in school were very achieving students and had been from the nursery onwards. The first one was completing her A Levels and I had no doubt she could apply to any University in the world.

But I struck a snag. Her father had no desire to see any child of his leave the nest. He and his four daughters along with their mother did not visualize a scenario where one child would be absent from the evening fun and happy family time that was a daily occurrence. I could hardly believe my ears. (Eventually all four DID study abroad and all four came back to live happy married lives within sight and sound of their father.)

Then came the case of a well-known hotelier who again could not bear separation. “He is my only son,” he pleaded. “How can I part with him’? In the meantime, the young man had applied and been accepted by some of the UK’s best Colleges.

“A degree in Business Studies will help him in his future career surely?”

“He can do something here no?”

At this point I was helped by his mother who had no wish to have her only son mollycoddled for no reason. So he was sent on his way with his father on the verge of a nervous breakdown.

Then came one of the school’s Head Girls who had been a success story from the nursery. She was an only child… She won a full Scholarship to the USA and her parents gladly sent her forthwith. The snag came in the form of homesickness. In this child’s case her homesickness was so acute she phoned home three times and me once a day. The problem here was her father who was ready to go to the USA and either bring her back or live there with her! His wife had no patience with either daughter or husband and quietly hid his passport. Of course it all settled down after a few nightmare weeks for papa and weeping daughter.

But the worst nightmare a Principal has is when a parent tells me that his children do not have to work because he has enough money for them to live in comfort the rest of their lives.

“My daughters do not even need to marry if they don’t want to” he told me complacently. The daughters concerned were happy either way.

But I must now take the cases of parents who cannot afford an education abroad. In Sri Lanka there are a few Institutions offering degrees which allow Sri Lankan students to study in Sri Lanka and sit for exams based in the UK or Australia. The tuition at such Institutions are good and students can earn a good degree without leaving the country. But these are not many and it is to my eternal (and ongoing) regret that I can only counsel the children of Asian International School or the children of friends who ask me for advice. I am happy to say that in almost every case parents have seen the advantage of an education carefully chosen either abroad or in Sri Lanka.

The aggressive advertising of certain institutions in Sri Lanka draw many kids to their doors – specially from local schools whose children have no knowledgeable counseling or for children with very poor AL level results where the only criteria to be accepted by these unworthy institutions is money and affordability.

For them the only possible saving from a mediocre education is if the Government takes the same measures it did in the SAITM case. Why it does not do so is only one more example of how poorly education is handled in this country.

Meanwhile, let me get back to my original question of parental resistance to higher education based on personal feelings. I am happy to report that in almost every case I handled, parents have listened to wiser counsel and have never regretted giving their children the opportunity to be global citizens. That chance is available in Sri Lanka also but only if half the present ‘higher’ educational institutions, with very dubious claims, are closed down after a thorough investigation by incorruptible educationists and NO politicians involved.

Surely our clever youngsters deserve this from their Government?

(Excepted from The ‘Principal Factor’ first published by Lanka Market Digest)